Dear the disenchanting, disrespectful, desperados that inhabit my hallways,

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines affection as a moderate feeling or emotion. I’d like to take the time to point out that it does not define it as “groping each other,” as students, specifically freshmen, would define it in the halls of Wantagh High School.

As we mosey our ways into our school before the homeroom bell rings at 7:37, we pass the couples in the hallways who mercilessly, publicly show their affection toward each other. It’s 7:30, I have barely woken up, and you’re worrying about how many times you can kiss your significant other before you part each other for 10 minutes. Each period at Wantagh High School lasts about forty minutes – enough time to watch a sitcom and a half. More often than not, you’ll be able to go that amount of time without contact with your boyfriend or girlfriend. Physical contact, at least, because I’m sure you’re texting and not paying attention in class. I promise that you two will see each other again, sever the ties.

We all have to deal with the slow walking people in the hallway, the people who stop to send the very imperative text message, and the couples in the hallway that want to hold hands and put each other’s arms around their waists, that want to savor every second of the four minutes they have together before they have to be without each other.

Concluding, before I have to throw up upon entry of the school, can you all please stop infesting the school with your cooties? It’s disgusting and embarrassing that everyone around you can perfectly describe who “that” couple is, the one that basically fornicates on my locker. I’d rather not have to use a Hazmat suit just to get my books from my locker (not your place to cuddle.)

“It is extremely rude to grope and hook up with each other while other students are going to their lockers,” says Steph Buffamonte, a senior, also has the same disdain towards the rude behavior that’s displayed in the halls. “It is awkward to have to go up to them and tell them to stop hooking up and get out of my way. The couple who has the locker next to mine, get so into it, that it caused me to have to scream excuse me and push the boy out of my way.”

Steph and I agree that if you want to make out with each other, do it where we can’t see it, you’re embarrassing yourselves.

As Mr. Hunter says, “There’s a certain respect level you should have. We get it, you guys are dating it, we all get it. It’s the up against the wall creepiness that gets to me.” So please, spare us the nausea, and yourselves the humiliation. Wait for the next zombie apocalypse to eat each other’s faces.

– XOXO, Hugs and kisses, (but not on my locker),
Kiera Fitzpatrick